The Cow and the Lamb

home sweet home

The Latest in Lunacy is a regular post I make on Facebook about Kyle and his antics, kind of getting ready for my children’s book idea. People love reading those, and get good laughs. I decided that making it part of my blog will protect my ideas with copyright until I’m ready to use them. You’ll start to see more blog posts about him and the white dog here too, because I’m trying to phase out this email thing by having you all subscribe to my blog, plus they’re rather comical and somewhat unbelievable. Together, they make life interesting at our house. It’s like how did I get so lucky to have this many misunderstood, mischievous, maniacal types around me. Right.

So Kyle obviously has issues with how Ari treats him. She yells, puts him out of her room, and pushes him around regularly. She used to slam and lock the door behind him, but since I took their bedroom doors and stuck them in the garage, that can’t happen. Of course, Kyle doesn’t listen AT ALL, but that’s not a big deal to him. Well, when we left my mother’s house the other night, Ari had a movie she borrowed and intended to watch. She took it to her room. That night they argued as usual, Kyle was ejected, he yelled, they fought, and eventually everybody went to bed. The next afternoon, the cow–I mean Ari–woke up ready to view the movie, but it was gone. “Kyle! What did you do with the movie I got from Mom’s?!” He had no idea. Trash talking goes on all day. Dirty this, bad that, mind your business, stop touching stuff, make me sick, shut up,…. Several times we heard, “Ari, I don’t know where it is (with a straight face).”

The search continues, everybody looking everywhere. Three days later, the cow is still verbally abusing the little lamb about what he did with the movie. Last night EJ went to prop the lamb on his pillow because he has this breathing issue. Lo and behold, the movie is right there under his pillow. Imagine that. He comes to tell me about it and we laugh at the way the lamb had looked at each of us without flinching and convinced us he knew nothing of its location. Then we laughed more at how mad the cow was. She was shooting daggers. “Stay out my room. Don’t ever come back.”

When the cow becomes aware of the movie’s location, she surprisingly does not berate the lamb right away. She too was amused at his deceptive prowess. She appeared proud, yet slightly annoyed that he outsmarted her. With a glint in her eye, she withdrew to her room. The lamb, getting ready for work today, said with a suspicious tone, “Oh it was under my pillow? And you found it? Ok. I’m going to put this movie on the sofa,” near his coat and work bag. But the cow knew better. He would surely have taken it to his workplace for his own viewing pleasure now that it was no longer hidden.

The cow, still shaking her head, walked into the kitchen this morning to tell me about the discovery. I told her I knew, and that she had only herself to blame for treating the lamb like a little baby, talking down to him, and slapping him around at will. We agreed that he is indeed a force to be reckoned with, and we will be watching him more closely from now on. He really played his part; even I had no idea he was deliberately misleading the investigation from the start. Let that be a lesson to you all–evil geniuses aren’t born that way; they’re products of their environment. Stay tuned for the next episode of The Latest in Lunacy (cue evil laugh and creepy music)…

From the Mind of: Tonya D. Floyd
The Signature Movement–Poetry and life skills training.
Coming soon.
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